1. |
(I Leave) No Shadow!
02:57
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Who do you think you are?
Who do you want to be?
You’ll have to change to stay the same as me
Your name your face your truth
Who gave these things to you?
Can mom and dad imagine what you see?
I know their world and I have no need
What could I want? I’ve already been set free
The shapeless faces on a train
You won’t find two that aren’t the same
And not one the same as me
Cuz me, I am no one
I stand against the sun
And leave no shadow
I leave no shadow
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2. |
The Heroes of Baseball
03:38
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In early August evening when the sun bleeds out the sky
We’d slam the doors and kiss our moms goodbye
And leave them home to cut things up and wish that they were drinking
While 40 years of tears would fill their eyes
And skipping down the lane we’d simulate the sounds of rain
And go pittering and pattering away
And later on the swings arranging marriages and scenes
And things forbidden by the tyranny of day
While the heroes of baseball would play
They never hit one out of there and always threw the game
For something else that drew their eyes away
We'd watch them suck each other's thumbs behind the dusty dugout
And It was realer than whatever we could say
And when the moms caught up to us they threatened us with daggers
They sent us home and sentenced us to die
In tiny rooms of tiny worlds that have no worlds between them
We’d lick the sheets and make our bodies cry
Trying to taste second base one more time
Time is like a statue and time is like a coin
Time grabs you once and never lets you go
The feeling disappears and leaves you nothing but some tender words
You shared one summer two lifetimes ago
But with our words arranged in rhyme we scream against the windows
And promise we will meet again someway
A word can be a hand that reaches towards a dusty diamond
That sits beyond the ends of all our days
Where the heroes of baseball still play
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3. |
Boy Song
04:22
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There are things I have left to show you
There are worlds we have left to explore
There are words I waited too long to tell you
And you don’t come to play with me no more
Did something hit your head and wipe your memory?
I never knew your face could look so cold
Can it be? I don’t make you happy?
Can it really be that we have grown so old?
Is it cuz your daddy hates me?
And is it cuz I look so strange?
Do your new friends talk about me?
Did they tell you things that made your feelings change?
Did you think they’d make you answer
For the time you held my hand?
Had you forgotten I’d always protect you?
Did you really think I couldn’t understand?
When you see me in the hallway
Don’t you think I deserve a smile?
If we never talk again
At least we had our little while
And do you think you’ll hear this song?
And will you know it’s for you?
And would I be a fool to say
I always did adore you
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4. |
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5. |
No God! (DEATH DROP)
06:41
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I know that you’re afraid
I see you looking both ways crossing one way streets
I hear it in your voice when I call you on the phone
I read it in your eyes when we kiss
But baby, don’t worry. you don’t have to run no more
Cuz I know a man who rode a rocket to heaven
And I met him at the sea when he landed on the ground
And he told me all he’d found
And there was
No God in the sky above
No God to deny our love
No God! No all-seeing eye!
No higher judge!
No God looking over us
No God worth more than us
No God to answer to
And nothing to love above me and you
I know that you’re afraid
Afraid that there’s nothing more than this
That when it’s all over that’s all that it was
But baby, what more could you possibly want?
I am your lover, you are my man
This is your body, these are my hands
Raise them up to the sky and we’ll shout out to nothing
Let them know we have nothing to fear!
God is the feeling that you’ve been bad
And God is an ugly mood we had
And God is the truth that was never your own
And God is the voice that sent you home
‘What sacred games shall we invent?
What festivals of atonement?’
We’ll do whatever we want to do
There’s no God, no God to answer to
No God to love above me and you
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6. |
I Can't Hardly Wait
03:25
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I'll be there any hour
Take half a month there on foot
Watering hole, scummy water tower
Sit on a boat if I could
I'll be sad in heaven
You won't follow me there
Jesus rides beside me
He never buys any smokes
I tell ya 'hurry up, hurry up
I've had enough of this stuff.
Ashtray floors, filthy clothes and dirty jokes.'
Lights that flash in the evening
Guess I'll follow them there
I'll be there any hour
Find a hole in the gate
Climb to the top of this scummy water tower, singing
'I can't hardly wait'
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Steph Jacqlin Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
steph makes records of her feelings and her memories
artist photo by Rose Paulson
banner by Joseph Rogers
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